"If you're left handed use your left hand, if you're right handed, use your right hand. Or if you're right handed, try using your left hand and vice versa". What was the fucking point?
"Petting is just randomly petting." "Use two hands to double your pleasure and double your fun!" "Relax you have the best teacher available... your cat!" "Caution, if your kitty doesn't like her fur disturbed, she might just tell you to shuffle out the door." "Caution, either they like this or they don't." "A whisker water alert is in effect here. A major whisker watch is in effect here." "Is your cat a talker? If so, cat massage will bring out his best 'mega meow' moments. We call it... Power Purring!" "The front of your cat is a veritable treasure chest of fun." "You don't need a swimming pool for this breast stroking!" "This is especially good for 'macho cats.'" "This is a really groovy move... Bell-y-rama!" (Singing) "Who's the best cat in the U-nit-ed States? It's you, Champer Damper, it's you..."
The best part is that she seems to be taking everything she's saying seriously.
@2:34 I love how the cat lifts his head, like, "What the hell do you think
ReplyDeleteyou're doing?"
"If you're left handed use your left hand, if you're right handed, use your
ReplyDeleteright hand. Or if you're right handed, try using your left hand and vice
versa". What was the fucking point?
Sing it!! Who's the craziest cat lady in the United States?
ReplyDeleteShe looks like Elton John.
ReplyDeleteThis video is full of gold:
ReplyDelete"Petting is just randomly petting."
"Use two hands to double your pleasure and double your fun!"
"Relax you have the best teacher available... your cat!"
"Caution, if your kitty doesn't like her fur disturbed, she might just tell
you to shuffle out the door."
"Caution, either they like this or they don't."
"A whisker water alert is in effect here. A major whisker watch is in
effect here."
"Is your cat a talker? If so, cat massage will bring out his best 'mega
meow' moments. We call it... Power Purring!"
"The front of your cat is a veritable treasure chest of fun."
"You don't need a swimming pool for this breast stroking!"
"This is especially good for 'macho cats.'"
"This is a really groovy move... Bell-y-rama!"
(Singing) "Who's the best cat in the U-nit-ed States? It's you, Champer
Damper, it's you..."
The best part is that she seems to be taking everything she's saying
seriously.
(reddit sent me) I've applied these techniques to my waifu, lets just say
ReplyDeleteive gotten some amazing results
You can't fool drool!
ReplyDeleteMajor Whisker Watch Alert!!
ReplyDeleteProceeds to rustle the whiskers. Wat?
"Simply start from the base of the rump, rubbing your way out."
ReplyDelete"Simply follow from the base of the rump, slowly rubbing your way out."
ReplyDeleteOR MY BOTH FEET?
ReplyDeleteSomeone doesn't need a man in their life..
ReplyDeleteIs she being serious or
ReplyDelete2:38 the cat be like "Are you serious?"
ReplyDeleteACCEPT ME
ReplyDeleteI wonder how many people think this is an actual video about cat
ReplyDeletemassages...
oh. and 2:54 there is a F**king time warp.
ReplyDeletemid back? EH!
ReplyDeleteRemember that Simon and Garfunkel song?...that says a lot about life and
ReplyDeletecat massage...
To be fair, the cat seems to enjoy it. And if the relationship works for
ReplyDeletethem, why not?
CAT ABUSE!!!
ReplyDeleteMassage... Not foreplay.
ReplyDeleteHOLD ON, I'M CONFUSED... I'm right handed, should I use my left hand or my
ReplyDeleteright foot? NEED A REPLY ASAP THIS IS CRUCIAL PLS